1 Nephi 8 - Call to Parents

Lehi’s Dream

It would seem to me that this chapter is a call to parents.  Nephi teaches us through his father’s dream that the things we experience as parents who are trying hard to live as the Savior would have us live are not only natural, but that we are encouraged to act on those feelings.

In verse five, it would seem that the guide to Lehi’s dream is the Savior.  I read the footnote to Daniel 10:2-12 and it is even more clear that it is the Savior.  That said, it’s interesting to note that in verses 7-8, Lehi is taken through a dark and dreary place.  Why would that be?  I think it is important that each of us have the experience of a dark and dreary place so we know how horrible it is.  Also, I think we need to show to the Lord that we will call on His name and follow Him. 

In the end of Lehi’s dream, he is calling to Laman and Lemuel to come partake of the fruit and to keep the commandments.  I think this is an area where we must improve.  Although we love our wandering children, we don’t remind them enough (according to this dream) that they are in trouble and need to keep the commandments.  There is a reason for this.  They wouldn’t listen!  So do we keep nagging?  Or do we just keep loving them and hope they will want to come closer to the fire that warms our souls?  I wish I had the answer to that question.

Ether 10 – Captivity

What exactly is captivity?  The dictionary says: the condition of being imprisoned or confined.

I’m fascinated that while many good men who were leaders in the land had sons who grew to maturity while they were in captivity.  This tells me that somewhat they were free to move about, provide for families, love enough to have families, provide some kind of food.  I need to put this into perspective.  Were the people who lived in East Germany before the iron curtain fell living in captivity?  Most assuredly.  They were confined to stay in their country and do exactly as the wicked leaders required of them or they were killed.  That said, it would seem that somehow the wicked leaders in Chapter 10 were able to confine them.  Did they have a wall like East Germany?  Did they have guards standing at the perimeters of the land who were willing to kill anyone trying to leave to another place?  It doesn’t say much about that. 

Now let’s put it into today’s vernacular.  Who do I know that lives in captivity?  This is where the Book of Mormon teaches me.  If being imprisoned and confined means we can’t move about at will, then those who have put themselves into financial prison are living in captivity.  They can’t surround themselves with people who are industrious, righteous and who have goals.  They don’t want to be around them.  It is uncomfortable.  They choose instead to live in squalor for two reasons. 1.  They can’t afford otherwise because of poor choices.  2.  They enjoy being around people of like mindedness, i.e. lazy, short-sighted, and not God-seeking and fearing.  If they have created a life of lies and deceit to others and to themselves, then there are places they won’t feel comfortable being – i.e. people they aren’t comfortable around, churches they aren’t comfortable in, temples they are not worthy to enter.  To me, this is imprisonment and definitely being confined. 

It is fascinating to me that when we leave the teachings of our parents to live a life filled with wrong choices leading to deceit and lies, that we don’t want to be around family, friends and those who believe as we were taught to believe.  This is a natural process.  As a result, that downhill spiral is fast and the pain associated with it is intense.  The Lord has created a world where we can be taught.  Wise people will see this and make changes necessary to stop the downhill descent.  Foolish people will close their eyes to the obvious and choose instead to continue living a life far beneath their potential.  It is sad to watch.  It is painful when it is one of your own children. 

Ether 6 - I Will Sing Praises

I had some interesting thoughts as I read Ether 6 this morning.  This is the chapter after the Savior has touched the stones so the Jaredites might have light while crossing the ocean to the Promised Land, AKA America.  In verse 2 it says “ . . . and he did put forth the stones into the vessels which were prepared, one in each end thereof; and behold, they did give light unto the vessels.” 

In Helaman 5:12 it says:  And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.”

A stone is also a rock.  We’ve been told that all things testify of Christ, and if we have eyes to see, we can see the Savior in any good thing.  Consequently, as I kept reading I noticed that v7 “. . . no water . . . could hurt them”.  They were being tossed in the depths of the sea, with continual winds driving them toward the Promised Land.  How did they handle this adversity?  I call it adversity.  They were in a tight space with only the food and water they brought with them for 344 days!  To me, that is serious adversity.  Yet they did  v9 “ . . . sing praises unto the Lord. . . and (Jared) did thank and praise the Lord all the day long; and when the night came, they did not cease to praise the Lord.”

This is significant to me.  I am beginning to notice a trend in my own life that I can relate to this content in chapter 6.  I’m under tremendous stress currently as we are navigating ourselves as a family through some pretty troubled waters.  I have a daughter who has finally decided after ten years to end a marriage where she was battered, beaten and abused emotionally as well as physically.  She has lost all self-confidence as well as her testimony.  Another daughter is with her to help her with the legal process as well as care for her, which is something we as her parents could not have done.  She was the only member in our family who has the skill set as well as the time.  She too, has lost her testimony.  The miracle in this whole event is that both girls have noticed the tender mercies of the Lord in the experience and although they are not where we would prefer spiritually, they have thanked the Lord for the tender mercies.  I have thanked the Lord they could see them.  In the middle of this drama, my mother fell and broke her femur, which has put me in the role of caregiver a little more than when she was independently living in her own condo.  She is now in a rehab center requiring a lot of attention from me handling the needs that the facility are not meeting.  Amazingly, it is all getting done – maybe not in as timely a manner as it should; but it is getting done.

So what is happening to me personally?  I’m writing music - probably at a rate that exceeds anything I went through in the early years of my composing music.  It just seems to come, and I find great comfort in writing.  What am I writing?  Arrangements to hymns that bring me comfort.  I too have felt to v9 “ . . . sing praises unto the Lord. . . and thank and praise the Lord all the day long”.  Psalms 104:33 says  “I will sing unto the Lord as long as I live: I will sing praise to my God while I have my being.”  I feel music in my soul all day long, and ideas come.  This is how I handle adversity.  Am I seeing the light spoken of in this chapter?  I believe I am.  He is my light and salvation.  There is no other explanation.  There is no other option. 

Ether 2:25 – Thanks for The Miracles!

Ether 2:25 – “ . . . what will ye that I should prepare for you that ye may have light. . .?”

As I read this last verse in chapter 2 of Ether, the words “what will ye that I should prepare for you” rang in my ears.  I’m currently in a lot of trials and tribulations with many family members that apparently is affecting me personally.  I feel like I’m handling it well enough, but tale-tale signs of the body speak otherwise. 

I sat here for a moment and thought about those words: “What will ye that I should prepare for you?”  I try to avoid counseling the Lord in what I would that He should do.  This is because of experience.  His ideas are so much better than my own.  When I ask for help, I make sure to let Him know I really don’t have the answer.  Oh, I’d love to have everybody peacefully living righteous, healthy and productive lives in my family.  But that would eliminate the trials that will allow that to happen.  What would I have the Lord do?  He is doing it!  We have seen numerous tender mercies, as my two daughters have miraculously been able to come together in the fight of my one daughter’s life to break loose from an abusive husband and a battered life that has left her with no self-confidence or self-esteem.  This is hard to watch.  I don’t believe for a second that the “helping” daughter being laid off from a job that was extremely stressful was mere chance.  The timing was perfect for her to offer her help to her little sister.  Job searching has continued while she’s been there, so it’s been nothing but a good thing.  She doesn’t do idleness well and the things she’s done have been what we could not have done.  She’s exhausted, but happy to be useful.

The Lord put in place two friends (my other daughter and her friend) to meet who rarely see other.  Their conversation led to the retention of a lawyer who seems to be made for this type of complicated event.  He is very caring and available to them.  His schedule on the first meeting was packed.  A cancelation of a deposition left him with an empty calendar all afternoon.  Chance?  You won’t convince me of that!

A young mom with tattoos and a testimony stopped by to visit with my two daughters.  They took an instant liking to her as she said she was just looking for the new girl she heard had moved in.  She wasn’t there to pass judgment or try to pester her to come to church, but she hoped to be her friend.  This will be such a blessing when my daughter leaves her little sister to return home.

There are other things in my life that need solutions, but I know the Lord will provide a way when we get to the point of making decisions.  My mother is in a rehab center recovering from a broken femur.  As hard as this is on her, I know it’s all for a purpose and the Lord will show us how to navigate through these tough decisions when we get to them.  I don’t think I spend a lot of time worrying about it.  The Lord knows my heart and my needs.  It’s his deal and I’ll do whatever is required of me.

So there you have it.  What would I have the Lord do?  Let my eyes see the tender mercies he is placing before me.  Let me continue to enjoy good health so I can help those I love.  Let my light shine for my family that they’ll want to seek out the warmth that fills my life.  I guess you could say, “Father in Heaven, thanks for the miracles.  Please let me be worthy of their continuance.” 

Mormon 9 – Enduring to the End

Since I’ve read the Book of Mormon many times, I know this isn’t the last we’ll hear from Moroni, but if I did think so, it would be a sobering book to end his writings on.  At this time he believes he’s done, or so it would seem.

What is his counsel to me? 

• To believe in Jesus Christ who is powerful to save me from my sins, my trials and tribulations.
• Believe that Christ created the earth and everything that is in it – including me. 
• Don’t deny Jesus Christ, or despise him or doubt him, but rather to come unto Christ and work out my own salvation with fear and trembling before him. V27
• Be wise. 
• Strip myself of uncleanness. 
• Ask in prayer for things that will help me accomplish what I came here to do – not to satisfy my own lusts.  Serve the true and living God. V28
• Be sincere and worthy of baptism. 
• Partake of the sacrament of Christ worthily. 
• Endure to the end.

This list is very similar to the list of things we were told to do this weekend in conference.  Enduring to the end is a big one.  This is especially pertinent if we have taken Christ’s name on us through baptism.  When we are keeping the covenants we have made and serving others, keeping on is the big thing.

I’m watching my mother struggle with old age and now a broken femur that is really testing her metal.  She is feeling pretty worthless and wondering why she’s still hanging around.  I can see the “enduring to the end” as a big deal in her life currently, and wonder how I would be handling a similar situation in my own life.  My day will come, no doubt. 

Most of the brethren who counseled “enduring to the end” are men in their 80’s as well.  One spoke of Pres. Grant praying for the courage to “endure to the end” at the end of his life.  Will I have the presence of mind to pray for strength to endure the trials?  Will I have the courage to do the things necessary to gain that strength?  Will I have the courage to let go and let God bear my burdens?  I think that’s a big one.  There are some things we cannot fix.  Letting go of them is a big step and probably very necessary. 

And so goes my life.  There are many things in my life currently over which I have no control.  Am I’m giving them to my Savior?  I believe I am.  I’m trying hard not to carry “stuff” that is not mine.  It is a mother’s desire to “fix” her children. But that is the Savior’s unique assignment.  I can only love them for who they are and trust that when they feel that love, they will desire more.  I’m incapable of giving the “more” love they will seek eventually.  Only the Savior can satisfy that need.  I trust in that one as I went through it myself.  The Savior’s love so exceeds any love we can experience in this life that anything I’m asked to do is worth feeling that love.  And that is what I pray for my children.