1 Nephi 11 – Have I Seen?

It started in verse 8 as I was reading this chapter.  I had the thought/question:  Have I seen the tree Nephi speaks of?  That shifted the way I was reading this chapter in a way that I’ve not experienced before. 

V11 – As I was “coming back” from a 9-year hiatus in my spiritual growth, I began to notice.  I began to see what others had and it was precious.  I began to desire these things, which led me to see other things.  I began to see the corruptness of the world I was living in and I wanted nothing to do with it.  As I began to see these things, it was as if someone was asking me what I wanted, and then moved me in the direction that would allow these things.  I began to see the Savior as a significant person in my life and the source of happiness I so desired.  I began to feel His love for me.  I could see the love of God was the “most joyous to the soul” (v23).  I began to see that the word of God (aka scriptures) increased my ability to feel this love.  The more I read the more I wanted to read and I could not drink fast enough.  Have I seen the tree?  Yes!  It is the love of God and I have felt it in abundance (v25).

As Nephi continues to observe and relate his experience, he mentions that after he “saw”, he “bear record” (v36) of these things.  It is the responsibility of those who have seen to go forth and bear witness.  It is a process, and I long to serve a mission and will do so soon.  This too is a process. 

As I read this chapter, I could see the process in a way I have not seen it before.  We have our own vision of the Tree of Life as we enter the fold.  First, we see something that attracts our attention.  I believe it is usually the happiness of those who are already partaking.  This requires in us the ability to avoid the “Large and Spacious Building” that is the pride of the world and humble ourselves to go down into the waters of baptism and become clean.  In so doing, we make covenants to follow our Savior and the path that will lead to our salvation.  What a beautiful process!  How grateful I am for the gift of repentance and the Savior’s Atonement that allow us to return after we have wandered from this path.  I have complete faith this path is available to all of God’s children.  And that faith makes the fruit of the tree even more enjoyable.  Just like I don’t enjoy sitting down alone to a table with a feast set before me, feasting on the Love of God without my family with me although wonderful beyond description, will not be the same as it will be when I have my children there enjoying this feast with me. That is why Lehi was calling to his family.  That is why I must continue to do the same.

1 Nephi 8 - Have I Been Taught by the Spirit?

I’ve had a sticky note in my scriptures since February 22, 2004 that probably needs to be committed to my scripture journal with some of my own thoughts.

Before I go on, I want to mention that this is Chapter 8 and talks about Coming Unto Christ, AKA The Tree of Life to members of the Church.  I’m going to remember exactly where this is by association with Moroni Chapter 8 that is the chapter on Baptism.  They are bookends.  And this has nothing to do with my post.  Just a note to myself.

Pres. Jesse Hunsaker was our Stake President at the time I wrote this note and he gave a talk that impressed me in the deepest way.  He asked if the Spirit has taught me?  In answer to that question, I will say I have, but it is usually when I’ve put in the extra time to really ponder after I’ve read my scriptures. 

He mentioned that in six weeks we would have General Conference.  He suggested I listen to all five sessions of Conference – Saturday’s sessions being the most inspirational.  I apparently took this advice to heart as we’ve been listening/watching all five sessions for a very long time – at least ten years. 

Pres. Hunsaker said, “If I am serious about wanting to be taught by the Spirit, I will put my major efforts on building my spirituality.  I will read quietly from my scriptures. 

He talked about Lehi’s dream, which is Chapter 8 of 1 Nephi.  There are five groups of people:

1. Family – Of no surprise to me is that the family is mentioned first.  The family is of most importance to Heavenly Father and therefore should be my priority as well.
2. V21 – Those who pressed forward – numberless concourses of people even.  Because of the mist of darkness, they lost their way and wandered off and were lost.  Yes, I know many who fit in this category.
3. V24 – Those who cling to the iron rod (word of God).  Clinging is a stronger word the holding.  How can I cling to the iron rod and be lost?  The Mutual theme currently was D&C 90:24 “Search diligently, pray always and be belieivng, and all things shall work together for your good, if ye walk uprightly and remember the covenant wherewith ye have covenanted one with another.”   This is the key to “clinging” – search scriptures and words of the prophets diligently, pray always and believe that all things shall work together for my good if I remember my covenants.  A simple formula!   V30 – There were those who held fast, continued to press forward and the Tree of Life was their focus.  If I continually remember that this life is just a test – a schooling for my eternal life – I will keep my eye on the Tree of Life and serve diligently to be worthy to dwell with my Heavenly Father again.  
4. Those who were ashamed and fell away.  My notes are sketchy but ultimately it is pride that is the culprit.  They were covenant-making people who let the things of the world get in their way of reaching the Tree of Life.
5. V31 – There were those who made a straight line to the large and spacious building – AKA the things of the world. 

 The bottom line to keeping my focus on the things of eternal importance are: 

• Personal prayer
• Family prayer
• Family scripture
• Personal scriptures
• Family Home Evening
• Regular Temple attendance

These are the tools I must use to “cling” to the iron rod and be found worthy after all is said and done to dwell in the presence of my Heavenly Father.  Am I capable of doing all these things all of the time?  I wish I could say I’m perfect at them.  It is my Savior who will pull up the slack if I am diligent and do the best I can do.  I will admit it becomes easier as I get older. 

As I prepare for Conference in one week and keep my focus on those things that are of an eternal nature, I hope with all my heart to be worthy to be taught by the Spirit as I listen to God’s chosen leaders teach us those things they have prepared by the Spirit.

Ether 15 – Hate, Anger Seedbed of Destruction

The last chapter of Ether is one that totally mystifies my thinking.  How does one get to the point of such anger and hate that their very lives are of no value over the intense need to destroy another person?  I understand anger and how it can turn your focus into a non-stop pursuit of getting even.  But would I ever have let it take me down the road to hand-to-hand combat realizing that one of us would be dead when it was over? 

We see this type of anger on the news every night.  We hear about murder/suicides of couples.  We hear of the troubles in the Middle East and their determination to kill the American infidels.  We see bullying among young people that oft-times result in suicide.  We see cyber bullying that is causing a great deal of destruction.  Obviously, I don’t and never have felt that kind of hate and desire to injure another.  Even the only one person in this world that I temporarily had anger toward I have come to be terms with and we’re quite civil toward one another.  I’m grateful my hate and anger did not poison me to the point of no return as the people in Ether experienced.  “. . . drunk as with wine. . .” is how Ether worded it.  This is so truly sad and pitiful.

So the question comes:  How does one avoid this kind of hate and anger?  Our world generates it faster than ever.  Its roots are in selfishness (https://www.lds.org/ensign/1988/09/dealing-with-anger-and-contention?lang=eng).  The key then, as this article quoted says, is to overcome selfishness.  Admitting that it isn’t all about me. 

Quoting from this article in a past Ensign: “The popular view of our day has been that we are not responsible for our feelings; they just happen. In this view, other people and events cause us to feel certain things, and so our only choice is how we are going to show our anger.

“Burton Kelly, however, points out that emotional responses like anger are actually choices that we make. “For us to feel emotion,” he writes, “we must first be aware of some stimulus—an event, a thought, a memory. Then we interpret that stimulus—and that’s when the emotional response comes. Our interpretation can be relatively positive, neutral, or negative.” (Ensign, Feb. 1980, p. 9.) The stimulus itself has no inherent emotional charge; the emotion comes from within us because of how we choose or are conditioned to see the stimulus.

“Thus, to be angry is a choice we make; it is not “caused” by anything or anyone outside ourselves. If we can teach our children, in both words and actions, that choosing not to respond in anger is within our control, we will teach them one of life’s most valuable lessons. September 1988 Ensign, Dealing with Anger and Contention”.

Using these quotes makes this less of my blog, but I like the ideas and agree with them.  Anger is a choice.  I’ve watched my husband for 35 years and anger is not part of his arsenal of tools he uses to navigate this world.  Believe me, he has plenty of opportunities to be angry.  He will not go there.  I’ve tried to emulate this behavior because I’ve seen that it is a choice and its rewards are many.  It has taken years, but I don’t get angry.  And now anger is something that seems so foreign to me. 

As we view the behavior of Shiz and Coriantumr, it is easy to see the selfishness of each.  To Shiz, it was all about his desire to get even for the death of his brother.  Neither of them was willing to admit fault in any way and was willing to sacrifice the lives of their entire associates (but not self) . . . for what?  What did either one of them gain from this pathetic display of selfishness?  The way I see it, they gained a whole lot of trouble to deal with in the life after this one. 

The bottom line:  We must learn to control anger.  We must avoid it like the plague.  It has the power to take us down right along with those we are angry at. 

Ether 13 – Anger

It is anger that trips Coriantumr up in a big way.  A prophet of the Lord came to him and told him if he and his household repented the Lord would return to him his kingdom (v20).  Why wouldn’t that do it for just about anyone?  Wasn’t it his kingdom that he wanted?  Sadly, the answer to that question is no.  He wanted to punish those who had taken it from him in the first place.

How many times does the Lord offer us the same deal?  Repent and come unto Him and we can be partakers of Eternal Life with Him, to dwell with them (Christ and Heavenly Father) throughout the eternities and become heirs to all that the Savior hath.  But we refuse to let go of the things that keep us from the Savior, i.e. pride, desire for wealth, fame, rule – just about any of the vices that can be found as examples in the Book of Mormon.  We have in the scriptures the outcome of this type of behavior, Coriantumr being just one.  He was left to wander in the wilderness until he stumbled across the Nephites in the Book of Omni 1:21.  What a sad footnote to ones life.  He lived with the Nephites for nine months and was never spoken of again. 

Do we want to suffer such a fate?  If not, we must be willing to let go of anger and its many cousins that trip us up.   Frustration to the point of losing control is one I battle.  What about not forgiving?  I think it falls in that same category.  I know when I get angry – really angry – I lose my sense of promise to Heavenly Father to keep His commandments and the covenants I have made with him.  It’s nothing serious like wanting to kill or do serious injury, but the Spirit lets me know in a very subtle way that I have crossed the line.  This happens most often in a thought.  I’m currently dealing with a son-in-law who has lost his testimony and is being cruel and abusive to my daughter – a daughter of God, a covenant daughter, and a treasure to me and to Heavenly Father!  Whenever I think of something I want to say to him or my daughter that is not what the Savior would say, I get a tingle in the back of my neck.  I know I’ve crossed the line and quickly repent.  This is such a blessing to me, although it does deprive me of a creature pleasure of the natural man to want to strike back. 

Today I will keep from having angry thoughts – frustrated thoughts that cause my voice to tighten even though I don’t say anything; I know the tone of my voice betrays my desires to stay calm and Christ-like. 

Ether 12 – Faith

There is no way I have the time to do justice to the thoughts that came flooding into my mind as I read this epic chapter on FAITH.  But I could not help going to my beginnings of faith.  My faith was so small and new, but nonetheless, it WAS faith.  I don’t even believe that I thought, “I will now exercise faith and change the course of my life”.  I only knew that I was unhappy and went to my knees.  It was such a simple prayer.  Actually, I didn’t go to my knees.  I fell on my bed in tears and frustration at my life and the pitiful way I was living and said, “Heavenly Father, whatever it is my parents are praying for, I’m ready to do what it takes.”  That simple prayer, according to Moroni in this chapter, was sufficient faith.  It takes faith to pray!  I obviously had the faith that my prayer was going somewhere to someone that had the power to change my life.  Believe me, it changed my life.

Verse 18 says “And neither at any time hath any wrought miracles until after their faith; wherefore they first believed in the Son of God.”  I don’t remember that my thoughts were necessarily turned toward the Son of God.  It was a very quick response to my simple act of faith though.  So quick, in fact, that I was left “standing in the square” wondering.  I gave credit to my Heavenly Father, because it was a miracle!  And the more I prayed, the more I saw His hand in the makings of a new life. 

Verse 32 says that “. . . men must hope, or he cannot receive an inheritance in the place which thou hast prepared”.  I don’t know that I was working on any “inheritance” at that point in my faith either.  In fact, I probably believe I had given up any inheritance and was the prodigal son and just wanted some crumbs.  I just wanted to stop living in such misery and hoped the Lord could somehow fix it. 

I think what I’m trying to say is that if anyone is really reading this and desires a change in their life, look to your Savior for help.  He has the power to change lives.  This chapter is an excellent guide to what needs to come after the exercise of your faith.  HOPE for a better future.  Verse 32: “. . . wherefore man must hope, or he cannot receive an inheritance in the place which thou hast prepared”.  I don’t necessarily believe the “place” is only after this life.  The Lord loves us, and he wants us to have joy in this life.  This world was created for our joy!  Moses 1:39 says, “For behold, this is my work and my glory, to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.”  Our purpose in life is to glorify God!  What a magnificent thought – one that brings me joy because when I’m happy, I know the Lord is happy with me. 

So is that all then?  Hope?  No, there is one more critical piece and this is where we get the rest of the blessing.  It is in charity.  In Verse 33 Moroni says, “. . . wherefore, except men shall have charity they cannot inherit that place which thou hast prepared in the mansions of thy Father.”  The love our Savior has given us by sacrificing his life for us is charity.  He requires that we “pass it forward” so to speak.  When we have seen the Lord’s hand in saving us, then we have the responsibility to see that others find that in their own lives.  This is called missionary work.  It is also called doing good works – passing it forward.

It is that part of this miracle – the charity part – that we must continue working on to the end of our days.  What a beautiful plan.  The stronger we get, the more we will desire to do so.  It is in showing us our weakness that we find that strength because we know we didn’t have the power to do what was needed before we exercised that faith.  What a beautiful thing.  What a beautiful Plan of our Heavenly Father.

And with that thought I will begin my day, which is a day I know will be filled with harder stuff than I feel I can do on my own.  It is only because of my Savior’s love for me that I’m able to make it through these hard days.  Yesterday was another one.  I marveled at the end of the day that I really did accomplish what I did.  That strength came from getting up early enough to spend time with my scriptures and then going forward.  When I give the Lord the first few minutes of my day, I know it will be a better day.