Job & Alma 16 - Trusting God With What I Cannot See

I started with Job this morning, still reading the Lord’s response to him. It is fascinating. We know so little of the world around us—just our tiny piece of it. Yet the Lord reminds Job that when the earth was created, “the morning stars sang together, and all the sons of God shouted for joy.” I believe that includes us. We knew what we were signing up for, and we were thrilled at the opportunity to come to earth.

The Lord also reminds Job just how little he understands about the vastness of His creation. The message seems clear: You don't see the whole picture.

And perhaps that is the point. All suffering is not divine punishment. Job’s part was to trust the Lord. Ours is too. The Lord is aware of everything—even the details of our lives that we cannot see or understand.

I find it interesting tha the Lord restored Job’s fortunes when he prayed for his friends.

It reminded me of a story President Nelson told about his daughter-in-law. She had a serious problem and went to her prophet/father-in-law for help. After thinking about it, he gave her one word: “Myopic.” In other words, stop looking so closely at yourself and start looking outward. Pray for others.

Hmmm. Job’s life began to turn around when he did exactly that.

By the end of this day, I finally got to Alma 16. I wondered if I could find any connection between Job and Alma. I think I did.

Some of the people wanted to rescue those who had been taken captive by the Lamanites. Where did they go for help? To a prophet of God. They didn't know what to do, so they sought prophetic direction—and then they acted on it.

We have that same opportunity today. We pray. We study the prophet’s teachings. We listen to conference talks. And then we go and do. We may not see the whole picture, but we can trust that we will be guided.

The result? Not one soul was lost. And Alma’s prophecy concerning Ammonihah was fulfilled exactly as he had foretold.

Then there is Amulek. He forsook his gold, silver, family, and friends for the word of God. Is that required of all of us? Perhaps not. But I do think the Lord asks us to be willing.

For twelve years, Clyde and I served the people in our valley who were unable to find resources for health care. We missed activities with friends and family because of that service. It was a form of forsaking, I believe. But we were blessed by it.

President Nelson has said, “The Lord loves effort.” Sometimes that effort is considerable. But when we are willing to trust Him and give Him whatever He asks, He can use our lives in ways we cannot see.

Alma 16:16 says there was “no inequality among them.” I believe there is something about serving one another that helps equalize us. We need each other.

Perhaps that is what I am taking from Job and Alma today: I don't have to see the whole picture. I just have to trust the One who does—and be willing to do what He asks.

Alma 15 - When the Spirit Asks for My All

Alma 15 took me in an unexpected direction this morning. As I read about Zeezrom, I was struck by the connection between the mind, the spirit, and even the body.

Zeezrom was sick with a fever brought on by the “great tribulations of his mind” because of his sins. His mind had been harrowed up. He was suffering terribly.

I don't think this means every physical illness is caused by our thoughts or our sins. But I do know that what happens in our minds matters. Thoughts can weigh us down—sometimes heavily enough to affect us physically. When we find ourselves in that place, we need to pay attention and seek the help we need.

Fortunately for Zeezrom, Alma and Amulek came into his life. And to his credit, he reached out to them.

Zeezrom believed their words. When Alma and Amulek blessed him, he was healed “according to his faith.” He got up, walked, was baptized, and from that point forward dedicated his life to the gospel.

I've experienced a small glimpse of the power of touch in spiritual things. I wrote about it in my February 5 post, so I won't repeat the story here. But I learned something at a Young Women camp that I have never forgotten: touch can be a powerful tool of the Spirit.

Then I came to Amulek.

We're studying Job in the Old Testament this week, so perhaps that's why Amulek's story caught my attention. He was a man who had something to lose. He had wealth, standing in the community, family, a home—an established life. And then he received a testimony that the things Alma taught were true.

Amulek was willing to give it all up.

I chew on this for a minute.

Are we willing to do likewise?

I've had to answer that question before. It was 49 years ago.

I had been touched by the Spirit. I was thirsty for more and couldn't learn fast enough. Eventually, the day came when I had to decide what really mattered to me.

I had been in a new home for perhaps six months. I was so happy there. It was my first home, my first ward family, and I loved the home and everything I had put into it. But it wasn't enough to keep me from following what I knew in my heart. I had a testimony that Jesus Christ wanted more from me.

He wanted my all.

So I packed up the clothes and basic furniture my daughter and I needed, and walked out of that home — never to look back.

There were challenges, but the Lord was with me every step of the way. Material possessions suddenly seemed unimportant. I felt strong and protected in a way I had never experienced before.

It is something a person never forgets.

I didn't forget.

And I thank the Lord for that miracle every day.

As I reflect on this miracle, I can see that what felt like giving up everything was actually the beginning of a life more blessed than I could have imagined.

Sometimes the Lord asks us to give up something we think we cannot live without. But when the Spirit asks for our all, perhaps the real question isn't, What will I lose?

Perhaps it is, What will I become if I am willing to give it?

Alma 14 - Faith in the Fire

 Alma 14 is one of those chapters that is difficult to read. Alma and Amulek have been preaching the gospel, and now they are forced to watch innocent believers be burned alive because of their faith.

I find myself wondering what I would do if I were in Alma’s position. The natural human response would be to use whatever power I had to stop it. Alma and Amulek had that power. Surely they must have felt the press within themselves to exercise their God-given power and save those people.

But they didn’t.

Instead, they stood silently while a nameless judge taunted them, essentially challenging them to use their power to save themselves and the others. How do you even process something so cruel? I think I would have been in shock.

And yet Alma knew something I might not have known. He knew they would continue their mission. How did he know?

The Holy Ghost.

That precious companion we are given when we are baptized and remain faithful to our covenants can tell us when to speak, what to say, and sometimes—perhaps most importantly—when to remain silent. I think there is something to be learned in becoming familiar enough with the voice of the Spirit that we can recognize it even in the middle of something we cannot understand.

Eventually, Alma and Amulek had suffered intensely and asked the Lord, “How long shall we suffer these great afflictions?”

That question resonates with me.

I spend a lot of time thinking about the Last Days and what it will be like before the Savior returns. We have been told it will be difficult. President Nelson has told us to “buckle up” and “take our vitamins.” We can do it.

But what will it look like?

Will believers be taunted, mistreated, and hated because of their faith? I don't mean to make Alma 14 about me, but it's hard not to wonder how I will respond when difficult things come.

Then I read Job.

The Lord described Job as “a perfect and an upright man, one that feared God, and eschewed evil” (Job 1:1). I love that description. What a goal: to fear God, turn away from evil, and hold fast to our integrity regardless of what happens around us.

And then almost everything was taken from him.

Job’s suffering was beyond anything I can imagine. I’ve just come through a week of dealing with a miserable skin condition, and it has given me the tiniest glimpse of how miserable anything affecting the skin can be. I’ve had one boil in my life—more than enough to know how awful they are. Job had them covering his body.

How did he endure it?

I don't know.

But I do know that Job held fast to his integrity.

That may be the lesson I need from both Alma and Job. Faithfulness does not guarantee an easy life. It guarantees that we don't have to face a difficult life alone.

Job’s friends give me one more beautiful thought. When they found him, they sat with him for seven days and seven nights without saying a word.

Sometimes that is what friendship looks like.

Sometimes there are no answers. No explanations. No quick fixes. Just someone willing to sit beside us while we ask, “How long?”

And perhaps, in those moments, the most important thing we can do is hold fast to our integrity, listen for the voice of the Holy Ghost, and trust that the Lord knows exactly where we are—even when we don't understand why we are there.

Looks at Alma 13 With a Different Lens

Alma 13 begins (v1): “I would cite your minds forward to the time when the Lord God gave these commandments unto his children.”

Forward? Why do I not remember chewing on this before?

Alma is speaking around 82 B.C., but he is taking his listeners back to the foundation of the world—to the time when God was preparing His children and calling some according to His foreknowledge. He is teaching them to see history from God's perspective rather than simply from their own place in it.

And that gave me a strange thought.

During the sacrament, I often think about the Second Coming. I wonder: It’s going to happen. Where will I be? What will I be doing? What will be happening around me?

Okay, that may be a little silly. I do tend to obsess.

But Alma made me think about it differently. From God's perspective, the Second Coming isn't an uncertain possibility. It is part of His plan. He knows how this story ends even though I don't. We don’t.

And then I realized that Alma was giving these people a glimpse into our premortal existence.

The priests he describes were “called and prepared from the foundation of the world according to the foreknowledge of God.” They were given the opportunity to choose good or evil, and those who chose good were prepared for a holy calling.

This morning, I read these verses as being about God's knowledge of His children. Me. Us!

He knew us before we came here.

And that thought became very personal.

He knew I would wander. He knew it would be for a short time. He knew I would eventually return with a stronger testimony and a greater desire to share it. He knew I would pursue music and that it would become one of the ways I could serve.

He knew I would have children who would wander, too.

And perhaps that is one reason I have become less inclined to condemn people for their poor choices. He knew them, too.

I believe there are blessings I might have enjoyed had I not wandered. I don't believe I had a hard heart, but I do believe I suffered from spiritual blindness. I could walk the walk and even talk the talk, but when I left the security of my home and family, I didn't know how to stand strong against temptations I had never known existed. I was a people pleaser, and had not learned how to discern.

That is the sad part of my story.

But I don't regret it.

Because I know more about the Savior now. I know more about repentance, mercy, and how well God knows His children – each of us!

Alma then tells us how we enter into the “rest of the Lord”: we humble ourselves, repent, bring forth fruit meet for repentence, exercise faith in Jesus Christ, and continue in the covenant path.

Joseph F. Smith described that rest this way:

“It means entering into the knowledge and love of God, having faith in His purpose and in His plan, to such an extent that we know we are right, and that we are not hunting for something else. We are not disturbed by every wind of doctrine.”

I find tremendous comfort in that.

The Lord has a plan.

I don't need to know exactly what it is, though I admit it would sometimes be nice. I only need enough faith to trust that He does.

And Alma ends with a list of qualities that will help us get there—and you know I love a list:

Humble.
Watch and pray continually.
Meek.
Submissive.
Patient.
Full of love.
Long-suffering.

I started this morning excited because I thought I had discovered something new in Alma 13.

What I really discovered was something I already knew—but needed to see from a different lens:

God knows the beginning.
He knows the end.
And He knows everything in between.

Including me. Including you!

I think I can rest in that.

Alma 12 - When the Word Finds Me, Do I Fear—or Soften?

I love Alma 12. It is dripping with doctrine—so much that I could never cover it all in a short blog. But as I read it, one question kept coming back to me:

When the word of God finds me, do I fear—or soften?

Alma is speaking to Zeezrom, but there is a large crowd listening. Zeezrom has been caught in his lies, and the people can see what has happened. As I read, I realize that I am part of that audience too. I am listening to Alma's words just as they were.

Then comes the sobering thought that God knows not only what I say and do, but also my thoughts.

That may be harder for me than anything else. Doing what is right can sometimes seem easier than controlling what goes on inside my head. I can refrain from saying something judgmental while thinking it anyway. 

Alma reminds me that I will be judged for my words, my works, and my thoughts.

I hope I get this mastered someday.

But something happens to Zeezrom that I don't want to miss. He begins to fear—and then he begins to soften. He wants to know more. He asks questions about death and standing before the bar of God.

This is so familiar!

There was a time in my own life when I began my journey back to the covenant path. I was like a dry sponge. I wanted to know everything. I couldn't read fast enough. I wanted to understand. It was one of the most beautiful times of my life.

Perhaps Alma wants us to see that fear does not have to be the end of the story. Sometimes fear is the beginning of softening and perhaps the first step into a beautiful journey.

Then comes the flip side that could be frightening: if we refuse to repent, our guilt will become our torment. I find verse 17 strangely comforting. Have you ever said something insensitive, rude, stupid, or simply wrong—and then replayed it in your mind over and over? You remember exactly what you said. You wish you could take it back. Your stomach turns just thinking about it.

That mental torment is real.

But Alma's message doesn't end there.

There is a plan.

Alma explains that this life became a probationary state—a time to learn and grow, make mistakes and repent. I am so grateful for this doctrine.

God knew before the foundation of the world that we would need this opportunity. He knew we would make mistakes. He knew we would need a Savior.

And He provided one.

That may be the part of Alma 12 I most want my children and grandchildren to remember someday: the purpose of knowing our sins and weaknesses is not to leave us hopeless. It is to lead us to Jesus Christ.

Alma says that if we repent and harden not our hearts, the Lord will have mercy upon us through His Son.

What a blessing.

The choice is not between being perfect and being condemned. The choice is whether we will harden our hearts or soften them. Whether we will continue in our sins or turn toward Christ. Whether we will resist the word of God or receive it with joy.

And then Alma uses words that I love: “glad tidings of great joy.”

Glad tidings.

Great joy.

The message of the gospel is not simply that God knows everything about me—including the thoughts I would rather He didn't know. The message is that He knows everything about me and has provided a way back.

Jesus Christ paid the price for my sins.

I can repent.
I can change.
I can learn.
I can be forgiven.
I can prepare to meet my Savior and my Heavenly Father.

So perhaps the question I want to leave for my posterity—and for myself—is not simply, “Am I good enough?”

It is this:

When the word of God finds me, do I fear—or do I soften?

I hope that when I discover something in myself that needs to change, I will not run from the truth. I hope I will become like that dry sponge again—hungry to know more, eager to understand, willing to repent, and grateful for the Savior who makes repentance possible.

Alma 12 contains enough doctrine for a dozen lessons. But perhaps this is the lesson I need today:

The Lord doesn't reveal our weaknesses to destroy us. He reveals them so we will turn to Christ.

And that is, indeed, glad tidings of great joy.

Alma 11 - Will I Like Her?

It’s been a long day, and my scripture reading was squeezed into the middle of everything else. Sometimes those are the days when I wonder if I’m going to get much out of my reading at all. Alma 11 surprised me.

Verse 20 was a bit of a red flag to me. Has our judicial system deteriorated to the extent Amulek accuses it of doing?

I believe so.

And I wondered, Is this really worth putting in a blog?

Maybe it is—not because I have anything new to say about our judicial system, but because Alma 11 quickly moves from money and self-interest to a much more important question: What are we willing to give up for money?

Kudos to Amulek.

Zeezrom is setting a trap for him. He offers Amulek money if he will deny the existence of a Supreme Being.

Wait. What?

You want me to deny God, and you’ll make me rich?

That was Zeezrom’s offer.

But Amulek is smarter than that. He recognizes the trap. More importantly, he is brave enough to call Zeezrom out on his evil design. He knows that Zeezrom's intent is to get him to deny his testimony, and he also knows that Zeezrom has no intention of giving him the promised reward.

Oh, Zeezrom, thou child of hell. You are treading on some dangerous ground.

Zeezrom loves filthy lucre—money—more than he loves God.

And then Amulek gets to something that really caught my attention. He tells Zeezrom that God will not save us in our sins, because no unclean thing can inherit the kingdom of heaven.

There is a simple logic to what Amulek is saying. We cannot expect to remain in our sins and still inherit the kingdom of God.

We will all be resurrected. Every one of us.

But resurrection does not erase accountability. We will be judged according to our works.

I know that thought is irksome to a lot of people. After all, the Lord always loves us.

Yes, He does.

But I can’t help but think the judgment may come from a different place. I wonder if, in some way, it will be self-judgment. We will know exactly what we did with our experience on earth. We will know the opportunities we missed, the people we failed to love, the things we could have become but didn't.

How sad!

Moving on, Amulek explains that our spirit and body will be reunited and restored to their perfect state.

That is the good news.

But then comes the part that could be uncomfortable.

We will stand before God with a bright recollection of all our guilt.

Ouch.

This isn't just for the wicked. It is for all of us. Every one of us will be restored to our perfect frame and then stand before the bar of Christ the Son and God the Father.

Amulek has done it! By verse 46, Zeezrom is trembling.

I can understand why.

Amulek is finished speaking, but what he has just given them is an incredibly sobering picture of the afterlife—something we are all curious about. He has talked about resurrection, restoration, judgment, and what happens when our body and spirit are reunited.

I think scripture makes it pretty clear we will all be resurrected.

The same holds true that we will all be restored.

Restored to what?

Amulek is talking about the restoration of the body, but there is another thought I can't get away from. What am I becoming while I am here?

Have I improved myself?

Am I becoming the person the Lord sent me here to become?

Because someday this life will be over. My body and spirit will be reunited, and I will stand before the Savior.

I don't want to spend my life worrying about whether I am good enough. I do, however, want to keep asking myself whether I am becoming better.

Amulek's words remind me that the choices I make today are not inconsequential. I am becoming someone.

And someday, I will meet that person.

Will I like her?

 

Alma 9-10 — How Have Ye Forgotten?

Alma asks the people of Ammonihah a haunting question:

“How have ye forgotten the tradition of your fathers?” (Alma 9:8)

I find myself asking that same question about some of my wandering children. How could you possibly forget the peace and joy that existed in the home where you were taught? How can you walk away from the blessings and protection of the gospel—and then deprive your own precious children of those same blessings?

And then I had to turn the question around.

How did I forget?

Because I did.

I think I found one piece of what I didn’t like as I grew up and magnified it until I could no longer see the blessings or the truth I was being taught. Little-girl misunderstandings became assumptions, and assumptions became my version of truth.

It wasn’t until many years of stumbling in the dark and then being led out of it that I realized what an enchanted world I had been raised in. I had forgotten the blessings and protection my family had been given.

Maybe I shouldn’t be so astonished that someone can forget.

Amulek understood forgetting too. He said:

“I was called many times and I would not hear; therefore I knew concerning these things, yet I would not know.” (Alma 10:6)

What an interesting phrase: I knew, yet I would not know.

He hadn’t lost all knowledge of God. He simply wasn’t responding to what he knew. But the Lord kept calling him.

Perhaps that is where I find the hope in these chapters. Alma was sent to people who had forgotten. Amulek had once refused to hear. And I know from my own life that something forgotten can be remembered.

There is a song my brother-in-law sings called Have I Forgotten Thee? I can hear it in my mind as I write this. Its message comes from Isaiah:

“Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.
Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands.”
—Isaiah 49:15–16

Maybe that is what I most needed from Alma 9 and 10 today.

I may look at someone I love and wonder, How have you forgotten Him?

But perhaps the more important truth is this:

He has not forgotten them.

I forgot once too. And while I was stumbling around in the dark, the Lord had not forgotten me. Eventually I turned toward Him and discovered He had been there all along.

I don’t know what will cause someone I love to remember.

But I do know this: while we are forgetting Him, He is still remembering us.