Am I converted?

Helaman 9 & 10

Nephi tells the people of the murder of the chief judge.  Five men go to check it out and see that indeed the chief judge has been murdered.  They fall to the ground in amazement.  Others come and see them unable to do anything and assume they have been stricken by God for murdering the chief judge.  On the day the judge was to be buried, others inquired about the five who had gone to check out the things Nephi had spoken.  They discovered the five had nothing to do with the murder.  Nephi tells the people the murderer is the brother of the judge and if they will go to his house and ask him if he murdered his brother, he will deny it until they see the blood on his garment and then he will say he did it.  It happened as Nephi said.

After Nephi displayed this power to see things through the spirit, the people are amazed, but they just separate and leave Nephi standing there alone.  I find this a bit amazing.  Wouldn’t you want to talk to a prophet if he were standing right there and ask him more?  Well, I think Nephi was a bit amazed as well.  He turns toward his home – pondering the events that have just happened.  I have written in my margin “pondering is the seedbed of revelation”.  Surely it was for Nephi.  The voice of the Lord came to him and praised him for what he has done for he sought the will of the Lord over his own will.  He wanted to keep the commandments.  The Lord said he would bless him forever and tells him all things would be done according to his word because he knows Nephi wouldn’t ask anything that was contrary to the will of the Lord.  Was Nephi’s calling and election made sure at this point?  Just a random thought.

Then Nephi was given power that what he sealed on earth would be sealed in heaven.  This sounds a lot like temple ordinances to me.  He was made a prophet if it hadn’t happened before then.  The Lord told him of the destruction of the Nephites if they didn’t repent.  Remember Nephi was on his way home.  He never made it.  On his walk there he was pondering and amazed at the things that were told him.  He stopped and returned to the people to start telling them of the Lord’s latest and didn’t stop until it was spread throughout the land – either by him or by messenger.  Again, I always wonder:  Just how big is this land? 

Amazing!  Did the people repent?  No!  Do we have similar experiences today?  Do we consider them miraculous?  There are so many believers in the word of the Lord, i.e. they know we have prophets who speak for the Lord.  Yet they continue to live lives unchanged - unable to break habits they embraced before gain a testimony.  I was reading a talk given by Elder Bednar last night.  This is the difference between testimony and conversion.  A testimony is the belief of something; conversion is the faith to implement action on that testimony. 

The people were convinced Nephi was a prophet and spoke for God.  They were not converted to the gospel however because they could not – or would not repent and change their ways.  We will see in subsequent chapters the results of this inability to be converted.

Am I converted?    Elder Bednar said:  "Testimony alone is not enough.  Testimony must give rise to and lead to deepening, continuing, ongoing conversion to the Lord Jesus Christ."  Do I consistently heed the words of the prophets?  Do I listen intently to General Conference with the intent to make course correction where needed?  These are questions we all need to ask ourselves.  It is one thing to bear testimony of truths.  It is yet another to embrace those truths and make them part of our lives.  Oh, give me the courage to follow the teaching of the prophets that I might truly be converted.